Divorce more destructive to teenagers
By ALEX LUDKA, Archbishop Spalding High School
The growing difference in statistics of the number of divorced and married parents in Maryland in recent years creates an astonishing and eye-opening gap.
Recently, divorce has become an accepted and normal principle of a teen's life. No longer forbidden or unheard of, roughly 50 percent of marriages ended in divorce in 1997 reports DivorceMagazine.com. Since 1997, the average divorce rate has become 2.5 million per year. This is a titanic contrast from the statistics shown for the 1950s, when the percentage of divorced couples was down to 2 percent.
According to the United States Census Bureau, in the year 2005, 53.4 percent of citizens age 15 and older were married. The same year, 18.2 percent were divorced. The increase in divorce rate from 1 percent in 1900 to 2005 is almost inconceivable.
Although the percentage of divorce has increased in the 21st century, the difficulty for teens to cope has in no way decreased. Over one million children are involved in new divorces every year. An Archbishop Spalding alumnus, Steve Bonolis, has parents who separated when he was a junior at Spalding. When the separation occurred, he said "it changed everything." He said his attitude and way of life was altered by his experiences.
Another victim of divorce, Spalding senior Matt Graves, had a slightly different take on his parents' divorce. The divorce occurred when Matt was only six years old. "I cried a lot but I eventually accepted it," he says. His dad was remarried when Matt was 12 years old. "Of course I wish my parents were still together. Some of the happiest times of my life were with my family before they got divorced." Statistics show that the likelihood of new marriages ending in divorce in 1997 was 43 percent. The truth presents countless questions about love, marriage and if the two could ever co-exist in society today.
Divorce has an enormous impact on everyone involved, especially teenagers. Adolescents whose parents are divorced often engage in destructive behaviors such as drinking, smoking, and self-mutilation. Several teens who were interviewed supported this fact. One student even stated, "Being a teenager is hard enough. Imagine having the one stable thing in your life be completely broken in half. You look to your parents for guidance and as role models. To see them suffering is unbearable. To see that they're not perfect is definitely a realization that came to me sooner than it should have."
Another theory supported by teens is that the younger the child is when the divorce or separation occurs, the easier it is to cope. A teen that has grown up with two parents that were always there might have a much harder time accepting that his or her parents are no longer together. On the contrary, a child under the age of ten may not have the memories or need for such stability in life. Steve Bonolis said, "There are so many more ways to escape things when you're older." By escaping the reality of life, teens everywhere are delaying the time in which they will accept their parents' divorce, making the separation even more difficult to handle.
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